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HOLLY MIRANDA SMALE

Writer, photographer, "rapper" and general technophobe takes on the internet in what could be a very, very messy fight. But it's alright: she's harder than she looks, and she's wearing every single ring she could get her hands on.







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Monday 12 April 2010

Surfing and standing

Yesterday, I spent the day surfing.

I`ve always wanted to say that. It`s not actually true, unfortunately. Yesterday, I spent two and a half hours lying on my belly on a surfboard, squealing and drinking salt water and being tumbled in various figure eights. Yesterday, I spent two and a half hours trying to say “gosh, isn’t it beautiful here,” but only getting to “gosh, isn`t it beau-” before a big wave crashed into my mouth and finished off the rest of the sentence; two and a half hours feebly attempting to get into a kneeling position on a surfboard without rolling under the water and getting whacked on the nose by said surfboard, and then surfacing to the sound of far too much laughter for my liking; two and a half hours flapping about like a maimed dolphin in a net, before indulging in as much tempura and noodles and beer as I could fit down my throat, because – after all – I must have earned it, what with all the flapping and screaming and laughing and whatnot. Two and a half hours, and I`ve got a graze on my tummy and arms that I can actually feel because I`ve done something to the muscles inside them (used them, possibly) and a bag full of sandy bits of bikini and the biggest smile on my face I`ve had in a very long time, because I think I may actually have found a sport I enjoy. Even if I`m predictably terrible at it. Which of course I am, because anything that involves moving my body almost always ends up in something being broken.


One of the reasons I took the position in Nichinan – apart from the fact that it`s beautiful and quiet and with children and far, far, far away from Yokohama, Tokyo or Hamamatsu - was because it is, like, The Surf Mecca of Japan. While it was a predominantly empty beach yesterday, as soon as the weather starts warming up apparently the sand will be filled with cute surfer-types from all over the world: a fact that is, frankly, both exciting and worrying, because my gasping and rolling around under water is going to be a lot more embarrassing when done in front of nice looking boys wearing rubber. However, it does give me a few cold(er) months to practice my skills, and I reckon that as long as I can stand up before I fall down again I should be able to pretend that I`m actually very skilled and just more interested in getting an even tan than in doing backflips (or whatever it is you`re expected to do once you`re vertical: I`m crossing that athletic bridge when I come to it, which won`t be for some time judging by yesterday`s inept performance). Plus Standing Up On A SurfBoard is on my Life List, so hopefully that`ll be one thing I can tick off by the end of the year; two if I manage to nearly kill somebody else in the process before saving them again (No. 9: Saving Somebody`s Life As Directly As Possible doesn`t say anything about not being the one to put their life in danger in the first place).

There`s something about this place – about bobbing around in the water, looking at the mountains and the boats and the sharp little islands (that look, as my friend said, as if Japan “rained itself into being” or dripped itself like hot wax) and listening to the birds and the waves and the drowning gurgles of terrible surfers – that makes everything feel more open, and much more possible. It makes London and Tokyo feel a million miles away; as if they suddenly stopped existing while you paddled out to sea, because they realised (with some embarrassment) they didn`t make much sense anymore, and all the noise and commotion was for nothing at all. And there`s something about surfing that makes you feel free, and strong, and capable of it all. As if it doesn`t matter how bad you are, or how far down you`re lying, or how weak your arm muscles are, or how much water you end up swallowing, if you try hard enough you can drag yourself off your stomach and finish off much higher than you were before. That you can end the day by standing up.

I`m not a good surfer at all - in fact, I`m a terrible surfer - but I`m very good at forcing myself from a very low position to being upright again. So I`m investing in a surfboard, and I`m investing in a wetsuit, and I`m going to spend the rest of the year doing exactly that.

And by God, am I going to have fun in the process.