Crabs

I've got crabs.

Not the type nice girls don't get. The type that walk sideways and have little pinchers and eyes that wiggle backwards and forwards. I've just managed to get rid of the ants, and the cockroaches, and the mosquitos, and the flies, and now I have crabs.

Luckily, they're a bit politer than the last set of monsters.

"Where do you think you're going?" I asked him as I opened the front door and he shuffled sideways towards my welcome mat.
The crab stayed very still, and held his little red claws in front of his face, as if he was trying to hide.
"You want to come in, do you?"
The crab said nothing.
"You're actually quite cute, so I wouldn't mind. But I don't think you'd be happy here."
The crab took one step towards me.
"Honestly, it's not for you. There's not much to do for a crab."
The crab wiggled his eyes and I bent down to get a closer look.
"You're very pretty, though."
He waved one of his pinchers at me.
"I would suggest that you scuttle back over the road and into the sea. I think that's the place for you."
The crab looked at me, and then looked at my welcome mat, and then looked at the house with very few leaves to pick up and carry around or watery ditches to play in or grassy patches to hide in. He did a quick evaluation, and then shuffled two steps away.
"You can come back and visit, though," I told him. "I'd like that. It would be nice to have some company."
The crab waved both of his pinchers merrily, and then - with a quick circulation of his eyeballs - disappeared down a crack in the pavement.
"Bye, then," I said a little sadly. I'd been kind of hoping he'd force me to change my mind.

There are monsters, and there are monsters. And the cute kind that wait to be invited in and leave when you tell them to: they're the kind of monsters I don't mind dealing with.

Monsters with manners.