Who is being horrible, and how do I find them?
a) Mum, I don't think death-threatening strangers is going to win me any popularity contests. Remember? We tried that at primary school.
b) Is my mother the only person who will ever read my Blog? I can't decide if that's depressing or reassuring. I might as well just phone her.
c) re. 'Jogging/bikini' comment, mum, you know where to find dad. Go and get him for me.